The only one thing that you asked for was for the garbage to be taken out. But, regrettably, it never got done. When you ask why they didn’t do it, your partner replies “I never heard you ask me”. Crazy how that works, how your partner failed to hear the one thing you asked them to do. This “selective hearing” is a common sign that communication is failing.
This “selective hearing” is often viewed as a kind of character defect. It’s like you’re accusing somebody of intentionally not listening. But selective hearing might actually be connected to untreated hearing loss rather than a short attention span.
What is selective hearing?
You’ve most likely been accused of selective hearing at some time in your life, even if no one used that specific term. When you miss all the things you don’t want to hear but hear everything else, that’s selective hearing. You hear the part about cooking a delicious meal but miss the part about cleaning up the dishes. That kind of thing.
As a behavior, selective hearing is very common. However, most research points to males failing to hear their partners more frequently than women.
It may be tempting to make some assumptions about that (and the way that individuals are socialized definitely does play a part in how this behavior is contextualized). But hearing health is likely another major component. If your “selective hearing” begins to become more common, it could be a clue that you may have undiagnosed hearing loss.
Communication can be impacted by hearing loss
Communication will undoubtedly be more difficult with undiagnosed hearing loss. That’s most likely not that surprising.
But here’s the thing: oftentimes, communication issues are an indication of hearing loss.
When hearing loss is in those very early stages, there won’t be very many obvious symptoms. Your tv may get a bit louder. When go out to your local haunt, you have a hard time hearing conversations. It’s probably because the music is so loud, right? And so, other than that, you could go through the majority of your everyday life without even noticing the volume of the world around you. Your hearing can gradually diminish because of this. Up to the time you’re having trouble following along with daily conversations, you almost don’t notice.
Your partner is becoming worried about the health of your hearing
The people around you will most likely be worried. Your friends and family will most likely be annoyed when they think you’re intentionally ignoring what they say. But that aggravation often becomes worry when they acknowledge that hearing loss may be the actual culprit.
So, your partner might recommend you schedule a hearing exam to find out if something is wrong.
It’s important to pay attention to your partner’s concerns. Have an open conversation and consider that they have a caring attitude and not just annoyance.
Other early signs of hearing loss
You should be aware of some of the other early warning signs of hearing loss if your selective hearing appears to be getting worse. A few of those signs include:
- Speech sounds distant or muffled
- Consonants are hard to make out
- Requesting that people speak slower and speak up
- Cranking the volume up on your mobile phone, television, or radio
- Difficulty hearing in crowds
You should contact us for a hearing exam if you have any of these symptoms.
Use ear protection
It’s essential that you take measures to safeguard your ears so that you can prevent hearing loss. Limit your exposure to noisy environments (or at least use earmuffs or earplugs when you must be around noise). Any feathers that you may have ruffled with your selective hearing can be smoothed over by using hearing aids to communicate more successfully.
A diminishing attention span will be responsible for most selective hearing incidents in your life. But you might want to take it as an indication that it’s time for a hearing test when people around you begin to notice your selective hearing getting worse.
